HOW TO BE A GOOD "MENTEE"
by Chantal Bonitto
I’ve always been good at maintaining a good network of people. I’ve intentionally focused on keeping in touch with men and women that inspire me. They tend to have more experience than I do and are therefore older than I am—basically, they’re Generation Xers and Baby Boomer professionals.
I learned the value of asking them, “Can you be my mentor?” This actually works! It is easy getting mentors, but keeping them engaged can be a challenge!
Last year, at Stern’s MBA conference in New York, there was a panel of extraordinary women in business including a partner of ACCENTURE. At this seminar, there were at least 100 young women waiting until the end of the program to get her contact information. If we played our cards right, contact with her could turn into a job offer, a letter of recommendation or important nuggets of advice. We were essentially competing to be mentored by her. Coincidentally, she discussed the challenges of mentorship. She said that she is willing to mentor younger people, but as a busy business woman (a partner of a huge firm, a wife, a mother, a friend etc.), she does not have the time to give all of her attention to an upcoming professional as a mentor. In the end, she made an important point. She posed a challenge to all the young women looking up to her in the audience. She said, “Most young people don’t know how to be good mentees.” Wow! That opened my eyes.
Well, I thought, where’s the booklet on how to be a good mentee? I myself have been a mentor and have been frustrated with lack of quality in the attention and communication with my mentees. Even as a younger person, I’ve been on both sides of the line. As mentees, we expect so much from our mentors, but what should they expect from us?!
I’ve decided to share points that I’ve learned that will help you be “A Good Mentee.”
1. Create a Personal Advisory Board—Have multiple mentors so you’re not always “bothering” one person. Remember that they have a life of their own.
2. Keep them engaged---Always ask them how they’re doing. How’s business, the family etc. Thank you notes are great as well. You can send thank you notes anytime for any reason. As a matter of fact add them to your holiday card list. There’s still something special about getting a card in the mail as opposed to an email. Be sure to buy quality stationary. Emails are great for checking in. It’s also a great gesture to treat them to lunch!
3. Acknowledge them –This is part of keeping them engaged. Be sure to thank them personally whenever you have an opportunity. Additionally, you can tell others about how that particular relationship has been beneficial.
4. Keep your mentors in mind for events that many interest them. If you get invited to an event that relates to them, or if you’re a gatekeeper for an event that may interest them, pull some strings to get them invited! Or provide your supervisor with the benefits of inviting your mentor. Do not say, “She’s my mentor so we should invite her”. Instead, express the benefits of her presence, “I know a partner from ACCENTURE, she’d be perfect for this event. The sponsor is one of her clients!”
5. Keep them updated on your accomplishments- Send announcements if you’ve received a promotion or have moved on to a new job. You can do this via email. Always provide them with your updated contact information.
6. Find a way to make a connection amongst your mentors—Connect your mentors with one another. This is the true power of networking. When you meet someone extraordinary, consider who you can introduce them to, as opposed to how they can benefit you. In other words, expand their network with their peers. In turn, they’ll value you even more. Then both of them can be on your Personal Advisory Board!
Mentorship is a wonderful and fulfilling responsibility, and as mentees, we should make it as gratifying as possible for our mentors.
